While Those Johnston Kids slept their way into August 6th, I woke up early to put change into the parking meter. The parking lot at the Holiday Inn Express in Regina could not accommodate our car and trailer, so I had to park on the street. It was raining cats and dogs when I went out. I had almost forgotten what rain was like. I tried to get back to sleep after buying time, but that never works for me. When I’m up, I’m up. Eventually the kids began to rustle the covers and I enticed them out of their blanket den like baby bears with the lure of the complimentary breakfast buffet.

I offered them two attractions in Regina, the Science Centre, or the RCMP museum. I was not displeased when they chose the Science Centre, and not only because science totally effing rocks and they will be scientists themselves soon. After the visit to Fort Walsh, I had had my fill of RCMP-flavoured jingoism and lopsided history lessons. I don’t think I could have handled any more tales of how the stalwart men of the Force had made Canada’s wild frontiers livable for civilised folk.

The Regina Science Centre was free, courtesy once again of our Ontario Science Centre membership. We paid a little extra for an IMAX film about the West Papua sea life, narrated by Cate Blanchett. The other IMAX option was a film about polar bears and the Arctic, narrated by Meryl Streep. I am not making this up. I would love a film about southern Africa narrated by Leonardo DiCaprio in the accent he did for Blood Diamond, but his career would have to dry up a little before he could get science centre films. Maybe Danny DeVito.

Every display was interactive in some way, which is great for kids. On the other hand, a lot of good science theory was omitted to make the displays more accessible. In the balance between information and entertainment, I think they’ve leaned a bit too much towards the latter. The kids – all of them, not just mine -tended to run up to a display and immediately start wrenching knobs and mashing buttons to make something happen. I didn’t once see a kid read the sign board. I suppose that’s why scientists are so few in number in our society. The inherent curiosity of the scientist is rarely cultivated. Wondering what’s on television next does not qualify.

The other complaint I have about the Centre is that the industry sponsors are far too apparent, both in signage and content. The agro business sponsored displays that encouraged kids to cut corners and use chemical fertilisers to increase yield when farming. More natural methods were discouraged as being low yield, and there was little to no discussion of environmental impacts of factory farming.

The energy sector was represented as well, teaching that coal and oil were reliable and cost effective, even though they produce pollutants. Wind and solar were dismissed as being unreliable and expensive. They even had a sick little survey that asked kids if they believed in climate change, whether it would be good for Canada, and if the government should do anything about it. This pretends that climate change is both a scientific debate and an issue subject to public whim. It is neither. Climate change is an undeniable fact, and potential solutions cannot be left to political convenience or popular opinion.

Worst of all, the nuclear industry sponsored a large walk-in display that extolled the virtues and safety of nuclear materials and power. According to them, spent fuel rods from reactors can just be stored until their radioactive emissions reduce to safer levels. They did not also say that the half-life of fissionable material – the time it takes for it to be half as lethal – is about 25000 years. So, you know, we’ll just store it until then. No problem.

There was nothing more we wanted to do in Regina, so we looked eastward again, to Riding Mountain National Park and the beach town of Wasagaming. It was a 4 hour drive, but Those Johnston Kids dozed on and off, it rained on and off, and we talked most of the way.

Just over the border into Manitoba, I saw a baby black bear hustle across the road into a stand of trees. At first I thought it was a dog, but as it ran across the ditch we came closer and I got a better look. Those Johnston Kids missed it, but it was real, I swear. Black as coal and breathing fire, with blood-red eyes that shone in the dusk.

Despite taking the ‘scenic route’ the bear was about all I/we saw on our way to the Park – except for bugs. Baby Girl thought it was raining at first, from the pattering on the car, and opened her window to feel it on her hand. By the time we arrived, the car was caked with bug protein. We could scrape it off with a spatula and spread it on toast, but we’re gluten free.